Musings & Life

Speed of Life

wee haus

Since the car accident, I’ve found myself rather distracted (yes, yes more than I normally am). Life is simultaneously crawling at a snails pace and speeding by.

In less than a few weeks we’ve found ourselves as new car owners (gah) and home owners. I miss the European lifestyle of not needing a vehicle, something which is a near impossibility living in Northern Ontario with how spread out things are and of course with our winters to rival those in Game of Thrones.

So wheels are acquired, and I find myself nervous and bracing when other cars cut us off or we turn sharply, painfully aware of my own mortality and how quickly (and easily) something could happen. I need to get over this, or through this, or whatever the hell – summer is coming (see what I did there?) and with it road trips which I’d once be so excited for, but now feel a sense of dread and impending doom in the pit of my stomach as they approach.

A matter of time, I suppose.

And while my wee head is still reeling from that, we’ve also just bought our first home! Something I never thought would really be possible, but with housing prices so affordable in the North and enough for a down payment saved, our mortgage will be even cheaper than renting here!

So while this is fantastic, waiting to move at the end of the month is driving me nuts.

It feels like our upstairs neighbour has amped up his weeknight partying and random clomping about, like he almost knows we’re going and is revealing in the fact with making our walls shudder and waking us up at ass o’clock during the work week.

I don’t sound very “Rock N Roll” here I’m aware, but seriously, I’m really envisioning something like this going on upstairs:

It’s not that their music or talking is crazy loud, all of that is pretty muffled, and we can drone out, it’s the jumping which is making our light fixtures and ceiling shake and our cats freak out. Like is there some intense Wii-playing going on up there? Wrestling? It certainly isn’t Dance-Dance-Revolution or amateur Stomp (not rhythmic enough). Just…WTF?

We opted to be passive aggressive instead of going upstairs and knocking on the door at 2am (I don’t think I’m quite ready for that). We can tell said neighbour probably has little speakers attached to an iPod or something vs…well Jeff’s a nerd and we have a proper sound system, so we threw on some aptly named ‘Death From Above 1979 (all bass and drums) and played the album in it’s entirety really loudly. It’s quite a beauteous thing to hear coming out of a pair of decent speakers I have to say.

Are we childish? Maybe, but it got the point across that we can ‘party’ as well, and equally if not more so, louder. The stomping ceased and we didn’t have to go upstairs and feel like Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne in Neighbours. They’re still having wrestling sessions from the sounds of it at times but at least it’s not at 2am. Still bloody annoying.

Man I am so ready for us to have our own home. And not just because of of the neighbours.

My adult life has been rather nomadic, always packing up and unpacking somewhere new it seemed. I think I’ve moved 19 times in the last 15 years, so this is a change I’ve been wanting for some time.

I’ve started going down a DIY blackhole – binging on HGTV – the tiny houses, the home renos, house hunters, and OMFG LOOK AT THAT KITCHEN BACKSPLASH!*)(@&#) Uhhhhhhh….so…very strange. I feel like I need to detox from that stuff for a bit now.

So that’s where I’m finding myself currently, counting down the days till we’re finally in our new home together, and listening to Death From Above 1979 ;>

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  • Reply
    May 4, 2016 at 8:36 am

    I have to laugh that you bring up Dance Dance Revolution–I was just thinking about that the other day! I have just about every version of that game, and the home dance pads and everything! I stopped playing a few years back, though, because it seemed like no matter what platform I used, there was a half a second delay in between the music and the steps and the sensors on the pad, and it was totally messing me up. I am not a dancer AT ALL, but man, I could stomp away at DDR for hours on end. I really miss it, still.

    Congrats on your new house! I am so excited for you! I can’t wait to see how you fix it up and your totally rock-n-roll kitchen back splash 😉

    • Reply
      May 4, 2016 at 9:04 pm

      Ahahah so awesome. I can imagine you being quite the fierce Dance Dance Revolution player. I could never get it to work properly on a home console so my experience with it was limited to the few times in an arcade where I was too shy to really throw my all into it. Maybe something to investigate again with a home console now that I’ll have a FINISHED BASEMENT and not the terrifying 1900’s stone one where we currently are. And I’ll be sure to let you know how I make out with a back splash DIY. I’m thinking little enamel heads of various hair metal musicians tiled – some interesting texture effects to be had with the addition of actual hair to the little heads as well. Also glitter. Lots of glitter. ;D

  • Reply
    May 4, 2016 at 2:56 pm

    oh darling, i can relate all too well. i was in an accident when i was 17 which i’ll spare you all the details of, but it was raining, i hydroplaned, flipped the car 3 times. i also walked away unscathed, but it took them four hours to cut me out of the car.

    it was REALLY hard for me to be in the car in the rain after that, and any time i was driving, i would have to pull over and hyperventilate some. even other people driving in the rain would give me a total PTSD panic attack. so yes, it will be hard, it’s going to suck, but you WILL get past it. just be patient with yourself and understand that you are experiencing very real PTSD, and to give yourself the room to freak out. it’s a totally triggered response, and it will happen.

    i can drive fine in the rain now, but i still don’t love it, obviously. but sometimes when i think about how much it used to effect me, it seems like nothing now.

    i’m so sorry you experienced this. i too, wish i lived in a place where i didn’t need a car, but texas is not that place.

    just take it slow and easy and be kind to yourself. i love you!

    • Reply
      May 4, 2016 at 8:53 pm

      Oh my goodness!!! To come away from a crash like that, but to be stuck in the car for 4 hours after the fact, I can’t even begin to imagine how that must have felt for you! Thank you so much for sharing your experience as I’ve been feeling like I “shouldn’t” be scared or stressed when driving given we’re ok, it makes me feel less nutty knowing that you’ve had a similar emotional response as well (though I’m very sorry you have too!) Really must work on applying the same kindness I’d have for friends and loved ones in a similar situation. Love you too Lau and very glad little 17 year old you made it through! xx

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